Good Things Out of Unwanted Things

August 04, 2008 | Category: Mother to the First Power

We wanted more than one. We were honest about it, right from the start. The both of us wanted a few children, bunched close together.

Maybe there's some who say a guy can't be 'baby hungry' but mine was - and is.

But he went ahead and picked the chick with the broken biology and, as the pastor says when he holds up the bag of treats for the Sunday Schoolers; "You get what you get."

We got one (1) copper-headed, funny, imaginative, affectionate, sturdy, and brilliant boy, complete with: dog, Transformers obsession, personality quirks, nudist tenancies, and overwhelming love of ketchup.

(The ketchup was extra, but nothing's too good for our kid!)

One? Is more than you can ever dream of - when you're dreaming. We often wondered, because an only child seemed such an unwanted situation, if we should reach out to the universe to find siblings for him.

But, as it turns out, one is its own treasure.

When I reached my limit some months back, frustrated because my son was with his friends (and their mother) and out of contact beyond the time he'd supposed to check in. But despite my repeated tries, she wasn't answering her mobile. I looked at CD and said, "right. order the damn phone."

I wasn't worried about precedent, or having to buy ones for other kids. My (almost) 8 year-old has a cell phone with a GPS locator because for $10/month technology means that his independence doesn't have to equal my stress.

Because it is just him, Bear has taken on a lot of responsibility. Since he was 6, he's been able to go out and start the car and the car heater for me on cold mornings.

The truth is, while he is very much the kid in the family dynamic, because it is just the three of us - we do tend to just hang out and enjoy each other's company without the big wall that both CD and I remember between us and our parents. We regularly decide activities together, by consensus. When something breaks, there's no dodging who did it - and we all pitch in to fix it. We expect honesty from each other, we also expect kindness.

On the one hand, I so sometimes ache to go through the baby years again. To discover a new person as they grow up. To be part of the cycle, again.

But most days, I realize how much I want this life, just as it is.

Oh, and I guess one more benefit? Is that we never, ever FORGET Bear. Not for a second. 'Cuz, you know... "One?!" "Here!"

Just saying.

Share: Delicious! | Stumble It! |   Slashdot It!