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A step at a time

February 17, 2006 | Category: In My Life

I want to thank you for your comments and emails of support. Friday afternoon was probably the most melancholy of my life. And that's saying something for a sentimental fool such as myself.

I don't think I have ever felt more alone in my life. More aimless, superfluous, or insignificant.

When CD came home, it only took one look at me to know that I had let go of my grip on the cliff.

He did what any superhero would do.

He made reservations.

So, Friday night, there we were...walking into our favorite local restaurant, It has wonderful food, eclectic atmosphere, and crayons for kids. Dee joined us there. To celebrate the begining of, well, maybe the end of...?

Anyway, Bear had a hamburger, French fries and milk.

We had bruschetta and cocktails. We had steaks and martinis. We had crème brûlée and port.

We had hangovers.

Saturday morning, CD and I played the "Parent Possum" game. It goes like this - both parents awake at the sound of the child and then see who can pretend to stay asleep longest. Or at least until the other one gives in and gets up.

After a few long moments, I propped up on my elbow and squinted at my husband. One look at his grimace, and I pulled myself from under the covers.

Poor CD.

Despite my advancing age, gender, and general all-around lazy state of health ... he was much worse off than me.

He claims it was the chocolate martini that did him in, but I know it was that I drank the port and he didn't.

I am new to port.

Port rocks.

In fact, I am so enamored of port that I ran out to buy a couple of bottles - a Late Bottled Vintage and a Tawny - the next day. A red wine I can get behind, is all I'm saying. My doctor will be so pleased.

Monday morning, I woke up and got Bear ready for school and then.... went to my office and sat down. My feet took me there before my brain could figure out what was going on.

[Brain]: Uh, feet, dudes, where we going?

[Feet]: Where we always go in the morning. Duh.

[Brain]: That sounds reasonable. Let's stop in the kitchen for some port on the way.

By the time I plopped my fanny in the chair, I was already feeling a panic. I sat and stared at my computer monitor completely at a loss. What was I doing there?

[Brain]: Hey, feet, let's go.

[Feet]: Go? Where? You mean, walk? Walk? Because, seriously, we don't do that anymore. We get you to this brown room and then we have to take a break. Union rules. Read our contract. Really.

[Brain]: You lazy shits! C'mon, c'mon. We need to stretch and move. Explore. New vistas, unknown country. It's the first day of the rest of our lives and all that...

[Feet]: You've got to be kidding us. Look. We get you to the brown room. Then you take over. Year in, year out. Ya dig?

[Brain]: You know, there's a pair of skimpy golden pumps in the back of the closet. The ones with the 4-inch heels-

[Feet]: You wouldn't dare!

[Ass]: Look, you two, can I say something here?

[Brain] & [Feet]: NO!

[Brain]: Feet, don't fail me now. All I'm asking is that we try something new. A step at a time. That's all. A step at a time....

[Feet]: Just one step at a time?

[Brain]: I promise. Cross my synapses and hope to die.

[Feet]: Well, all right then. If you can convince ass to get outta this chair than I can take you there. A step at a time.

[Ass]; As if, you-

[Feet]: Don't MAKE me kick you, because you know I can!

[Brain]: Ladies, ladies. Let's work together here. We got whole new worlds to explore. Ready?

[Feet] & [Ass]: Let's do it...

And that's when I turned off the monitor, and took the first step.

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Tagged: Corporate, Mommy, Life


That was great! Thanks for sharing. How was your 1st day?

Posted by: Eyes on February 23, 2006 10:46 AM

That's beautiful. And hilarious.

Good luck with that western sandy town thing.

I live in one (in New Mexico) and used to live in another (in New Mexico.) It ain't so bad. : )

(Unless it's really, really, small, then I complain about other things...but never mind all that...)

Posted by: Krisco on February 22, 2006 09:34 PM


I know it will take time to settle in, but this is such a wonderful thing.

Posted by: halloweenlover on February 22, 2006 11:41 AM


that's awesome. (mainly thinking about the transition, here, but the discovery of port is its own momentous occasion.)

wishing you joyous support from afar ...

Posted by: alice on February 21, 2006 01:49 PM

Port is just about the best way I know to end a meal... even better if there's good, dark chocolate to go with it. Yum.

I hope your brain, ass and feet continue to cooperate. Quite a transition you're making, but I know (all of) you can do it.

Posted by: Kimberly on February 19, 2006 02:19 PM

I'm so proud of you!! This has got to be quite a shock to your system. Just remember, when "Friends" went off the air, not even Jennifer Anniston knew what to do with the sudden free time. And she has people who THINK for her!
I'm not a fan of port, but chocolate martinis are my absolute favourite thing in the whole world. My favourite place here in the boonies has them, and cajun chicken ceasar salad to die for. It has warm fresh green beans in it. Trust me. It's goooooood.

Posted by: Tammy on February 18, 2006 08:07 PM

Of all the posts I'd think you would write, a conversation between your feet, ass and brain was never one of them! Hee hee. ;)

I hope you're settling in nicely to your new life. One step at a time. Remember that.

Posted by: Lucinda on February 18, 2006 07:58 PM

I wish my brain would talk to my ass, thighs, and hips more. Maybe they'd finally listen for once.

“The distance is nothing; it is only the first step that is difficult.” - Madame Marie du Deffand

Congratulations, dear.

Posted by: ieatcrayonz on February 18, 2006 09:33 AM

Yay! I am also proud of and happy for you. :)

Your feet/brain/ass convo was hillarious.

As for parent possum...does it count if you're just playing it with the dogs? If so, we do that all the time too.

Posted by: beth on February 18, 2006 07:22 AM

Through trial and error, we no longer do the possum game on the weekends. Saturday mornings the hubs gets up with the kidlings. Sunday mornings are my turn. This way we each get to sleep in.

Posted by: Grace on February 17, 2006 10:24 PM

Port good. Walking, good.

Sounds good so far!

By the way, I'd be happy to take you out for port one of these days soon. In celebration of new vistas, and all!

Posted by: laura on February 17, 2006 09:22 PM

Sounds like a wonderful way to celebrate (except for the hangover part)

Hoping that this week has been a good transition for all of you!

Posted by: caltechgirl on February 17, 2006 12:38 PM

We play "Parent Possum" in our house too - but I always seems to loose :)

Glad to hear you enjoyed your evening out. After last week, you deserved it!!

Posted by: Helene on February 17, 2006 11:52 AM

YAY! I'm so proud of you! And so happy for you.

You also would have loved the Port wine dinner I attended last week. 4 different ones. Fabulous. A lecture, too, on the history of them.

Posted by: RP on February 17, 2006 11:25 AM