Sometimes Bad Things Go Away (for a while)

August 16, 2007 | Category:

It was Bear getting sick, that forced me to evaluate my choices in life.

When his fever broke, I thought 'Oh, he's ok now.'

But he wasn't.

The next 18 months, Bear kept getting cold after cold and constant torturing headaches.

The triumvirate of his doctor, CD, and I suspected that he was showing some new and persistent allergies. We live in an old, crumbling house - so, mold, dust, dander, and sloth ("sloth's" a thing, right?) are our longtime companions.

But despite some relief from your usual allergy medications, Bear's quality of life (and our worry levels) was suffering. So guessing had to give way to knowing so we could treat him better.

Last March, we began making trips to Children's Memorial Hospital in downtown Chicago for tests.

Specialists, Neurologists, MRI, blood tests, name it. We held his hand and prayed in test after test, surrounded by other children and other parents all praying and holding too.

The initial results came back: mildly allergic to mold and dust and pollens. Doesn't have an alphabetic list of really scary things. Had a profound sinus infection of unknown cause, and probably what was triggering the sever pediatric headaches.

The family doctor and CD and I put a stop to the testing at that point. Hoping there wasn't something else hiding under the bed, we took on 7 medications for what we now knew to be real.

And Bear's quality of life has steadily improved.

Yesterday, we did a follow-up. He's covered in strange bugbites (which are probably the strange bugs that just invaded Chicago but in case not, meant a script to ward off Lyme Disease), he's got purple and orange bruises from sundry activities, and there was the 'opting out' comment from sports camp.

She talked to him about that and then told us that the fact that Bear had had a great time at camp and had asked to go back for all 3 sessions this summer was a very good sign.

That if he was overwhelmed during things like dodgeball ('Dodgeball's just nuts,' she laughed. 'I wouldn't play it either.') he was finding ways to cope with that and still enjoy the other things he enjoys - like obstacle course races and king of the hill.

She looked at the bruises, bites, up the nose, and between the toes.

Listen, Elizabeth, she said, suddenly serious.

I put my hand over my heart and waited to hear the worst.

I've never seen him so healthy. she said. He looks like a kid should at the end of a busy summer. Then she turned to him. Any complaints? She asked. How about the headaches? Fewer? More?

Bear shrugged. I don't get headaches anymore, he said.

Our eyes locked over his head. I hadn't even realized, but then I did.

She looked down at his chart: height and weight are normal, his sinuses are completely clear, headaches abated, even the rough toes that bled from an allergic reaction to his Crocs are healed up.

You've been taking great care of him, kiddo, she said to me with a smile after she'd congratulated him for being so healthy.

I nodded, slowly.

Bear took my hand and we scrambled down the hallway and out to the parking lot and into the van.

Mommy? he called from the backseat. I'm buckled in. Let's go.

I nodded, slowly.

Mommy? Are you crying?

I shook my head. No, I'm... fine. We're fine, sweetie.

I started the engine to prove the point.

But it was a lie.

I know that a single good exam doesn't mean it's all cupcakes and roses from now on. I do.

But..... uh, well, when it's the first good exam in almost 2 years. So damn it, yeah, maybe I did cry a little. And maybe I still am.

(If only all those other families at Children's could have this moment, too...)

Bear doing a crescent kick at June's Karate/TKD tournament.



Do you see a puppy in that bed? I don't see no puppy...

Waiting for his 'Ups' during a t-ball game.

About to win a really big honkin' monkey at HolidayWorld, Mo.

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