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I fire myself

June 07, 2006 | Category: In My Life

I don't know what this is, this antipathy I have for Happy Montessori.

(The rest of my whining is below the jump...)

But when I my job ended, one of the things I really wanted to do is be more involved at the school. I volunteered for Wedensday mornings, for the annual Silent Auction, to help monitor the playground and whatever else they might need.

It's been going.....


I am always late. Always. I forget about my volunteer times, forget to put them on the calendar. Forget to buy the cheese for the class party ("That's ok, Mommy," Bear said yesterday afternoon. "We all make mistakes.").

We were late to the class picnic at the park last weekend, and Bear missed out on being in the picture.

I am utterly blocked when it comes to school things. Which is really out of character for me.

Part of it may be that when I was working, I was so crazy that I was constantly, hyperactively checking all the notes home and sending myself emails and making CD remember too.

Now it all rests on me, in this little warm vacuum. Friday is Bear's last day, maybe ever, at Happy Montessori - and I wonder what I am going to screw up next.

Last night, after working 12 hours on a small project for a friend (money! money is good!), and realizing I'd forgotten the class party. I muttered "I SO fire myself!"

But this morning, I have volunteer at drop-off. For which I am sure I will be late.

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Tagged: Corporate, Mommy, Life


Hey, I write everything down. At the beginning of the year I print out the 12 months and write everything coming up in it. It helps me out A LOT and helps me remember.

Posted by: Chica on June 9, 2006 02:46 PM

You're in transition. It'll get easier. Don't be so hard on yourself, or worry about other's view or opinion of your 'timeliness' or anything else.

Keep focused on the positive - happy, healthy kid . . .

Posted by: Philip on June 9, 2006 10:46 AM

I know when I struggle with something I am capable of doing or remembering I usually find something blocking me, some psychological reason standing in my way. So I'll throw out a couple of possibilities and you can throw them out or ignore them (or me) if you'd like.

Having recently quit a pretty intense job, are you concerned about getting sucked into something else and thus are holding back?

Is there anything about any of the people you have to deal with there that makes you want to avoid them?

Maybe something to do with Bear growing up?

Frankly, this is how I figure it out. I think up possible "issues" until one of them makes my stomach cringe and I go, "OOOOooooohhhhh, that makes sense" and then I can figure out what I want to do about it.

I certainly don't know you that well, but you seem pretty darn responsible and not one to "screw things up." This is an aberration, not a personality characteristic. You'll figure it out.

Posted by: JGS on June 8, 2006 04:13 AM

My biggest fear about parenthood used to be not getting enough sleep. But as time goes on and I have friends and family with kids who are school-age, I find I have some new biggest fears about parenthood. The general gist of which is that I am SURE I would not fit in with the other moms of the theoretical classmates of my theoretical child. My own grammar school experience was pretty bad, socially, although I got a great education. I just don't know it I've gotten any better at schoolyard politics as an adult than I was as a child. That is probably one reason homeschooling appeals to me, although I admit that alone is a pretty poor reason for homeschooling.

I am hoping that in the next few years I will have to deal with all of the above, because it will mean I will have successfully achieved mommydom. But what I am observing is that there is more to school than wether the kid is getting good grades and getting along well with peers, in terms of stressors for parents. There is the issue of the parents being comfortable with the school and being able to work well with teachers and other parents.

I can theoretically relate to being a fish out of water at Bear's school. But, I am certain that a) you are not the only parent who feels the way you do and b) you are still shifting gears. Once you find your stride, I suspect you will end up applying your excellent project management skills to the task of being present and involved in Bear's education. And it will get much easier.

I recently read a good article about just this in a magazine a couple of weeks ago. About working moms who find themselves suddenly stay-at-home moms, and trying to adjust to the new rhythm of life and new parenting style. If I find the article I will save it for you.

Posted by: laura on June 7, 2006 11:58 AM