Once upon a time my parents spent a bunch of money having extensive batteries of educational tests done on all three of their children. Mom says it was one of the best things they ever did because it allowed her to understand her introverted child (me!). Maybe some more information would be helpful to you too.

We're going to therapy right now to teach our 8-year old how to do just that--walk away when you feel overwhelmed. You know, rather than go balistic and punch people.

I don't know--sometimes you just can't win, eh? But I think there's a middle ground. Sounds like he's just the type of kid who knows when he needs some time away, and there's nothing wrong with that. And frankly, the Future PE Teachers of America might not be the best people to judge whether what he's doing is healthy/normal behavior for *him*. But if you feel in your gut that maybe he's pulling away more than usual because he's stressed out or overwhelmed by life in general rather than by the particular rigors of sports camp, it's probably a good idea to get some help finding ways to help him cope.

Not to be an alarmist, but yes. With your concerns at his school, his debate about which hand, some of your comments about his participation, he may have a non-verbal learning disability. I am a TEACHER and I missed this with my son until he was 17 and almost kicked out of school twice now. He is extremely bright verbally (functioning at college level and in the school's gifted program to boot) but just seemed to be slower at math (no problem) and making stupid decisions about many social things that got him into hot water (passed off as growing pains or stupid teenager). Though he had friends, he preferred to stay cocooned in his room during stressful times which I thought was only a coping mechanism. It wasn't until I pulled him out of public school (when he was on the verge of being placed in their alternative ed program), got the assistance of an educational consultant, and had him in an outward bound theraputic educational program that his testing revealed his learning problem. His verbal skills enabled him to cover up his problems. He was the biggest split between verbal and non-verbal that the psychologist had seen in her 20 year career and she (as well as all of us) were appalled that the school missed it. This non-verbal learning disability manifests itself in social interactions and problems interpreting vocal and facial social cues. Now, as a senior, his self esteem is crushed, his foolish decisions will lead to major legal repurcussions now that he is almost 18, and he is refusing to deal with both his disability and his unwise decisions. I am on the verge of losing my son forever, the bright articulate, child I love is going down a very dark corridor. I am attempting to get him into a theraputic boarding school so he can learn the skills that he is so missing and his educators either ignored or were ignorant of. Get into the educational websites for non-verbal learning disabilities to watch for some of the warning signs. As I stated, I may be an alarmist, but had I known all the signs I could have intervened before it was too late. Good luck!

If it's enough to cause concern among people who spend their days with kids, perhaps you need to look into it. I don't know, Elizabeth. But I'd keep an eye on him.

As one who enjoys sports, and some mandatory alone time every day, I'd say that's just the way he may be. He may just be the kind of kid who likes mano-a-mano types of sports, vs. a big team. I really only loved soccer because all the guys on my team as a kid where already my friends.

There could also have been some kids there that he didn't interact well with. As someone who was an 'only' for the first 6 years, and the father of an only child, I can say that not having siblings does give you a bit less tolerance for the actions of others, so he might just have learned he *can* walk away from these kids, since they're not siblings he *has* to get along with.

Anyway, just my 2 cents. I do have to agree though, that since the fatted calf wasn't working, knowing *before* spending the rest of the cash might have been nice....

Your old Friend in the Rocky Mountains majesty...

P.S - Next time you need one of those calves, I can get you a deal below retail :-).

RDC

My 3yr old does this too. He's not an only child. At his last birthday party, he and I watched 25 friends and family riding horses, ATVs, and playing on the new swing set while safely hunkered down in a fort. He just needs time alone to decompress when he's overwhelmed. I don't worry about it. The same impulse drives me into the tub with a good book after a long day at work or chasing my kids.

Let me preface this by saying that I don't have kids so I am coming at this from a person looking back at her own childhood perspective.

I was like that. I still am. Quiet, a few good friends rather than a big group (though in High School we were a big group).
My 2 cents would be to talk to him, find out if something is wrong or if he just needs smaller doses of loud. (You said he's well liked and he really enjoys it, right?)
Maybe he's just more introverted. When I was a kid/teenager I used to say my parents didn't want me to go places just so I wouldn't have to explain why i didn't want to.
I'd say talk to him and help him understand that it's ok to want some alone time.
But again, I have no kids and this is just my take.
I can tell you more about this introvert thing if you email me. I've read up on it :)

Worry? Because he needs some downtime? I think it shows a good deal of self-awareness and maturity for him to realize that he's getting overwhelmed, and that he needs to recharge his batteries. Other kids would just keep going and then have a meltdown.

He enjoys the camp--he just needs more breaks than they allow for. I remember feeling the same way. I craved social contact as a kid, but it also would exhaust me. Actually, that's still how I feel. I love conferences, but I always need my own hotel room (sans roommates) so that I can escape and decompress.