Ooh - tough decision! My son (12) is an August birthday & started kindergarten at 5, my daughter (9) is a Septermber birthday & started at 6. I wish I would've held my son back, he was mentally ready but not socially (which we learned too late)and still hasn't really caught up. My daughter, on the other hand, is doing much better all around; but I can't trace that to starting Kindergarten late.
Hopefully you'll find the answer for Bear soon.

I say shoot and ask questions later!

Oh wait wrong cliche'

We started one early and the other we may need to wait until his teen years to enroll. I think it's a gut feeling. Yeah go with your gut.

I'd say ignore ages, ignore social strata, ignore youngest/oldest. Put him where the content will appeal to him the most. If he's interested in what he's doing he'll be comfortable where he is.

From the point of view of academics, studies have pretty consistently shown that it's better to have them go ahead and start kindergarten sooner for kids whose age is on the borderline. (Source of random factoid: Einstein Never Used Flash Cards, which I just finished a couple of days ago). Especially since this way he gets to keep the same teacher, that's probably the way I'd go. But I think Bear will land on his feet no matter where you put him - he seems to be that kind of kid.

I was a september birthday. They held me back so I was the oldest. Forever after that I always had older friends. I feel more comfortable with people 2+ years older than me. However, at the district I went to school they had advanced learning classes so I was taking classes 2 or more ahead of each grade I was in. I think it really doesn't matter. He'll fit in just fine. Kid's adapt.

I always wondered if there was a stigma from being the "oldest" in a class. There wasn't on me, being the "youngest" - but then, there were always a few kdis who'd skipped a grade so I wasn't really the youngest anyway.

Bear isn't all that interested in academics yet, although he seems to learn by osmosis - since he is starting to read and write now just the same as his classmates who spend a lot of time with the sandpaper letters at school.

He loves karate but other sports not so much yet. He will spend hours and hours running around the playground at full speed with the kids playing tag and "chase me" but he isn't quite "there" for organized sport.

I had never thought about a possible 2-year stint in Kindergarten. That's really got me thinking. Has anyone else done that?

I've moved from antisocial bitch to www.ded63.com. Please update your link when you get a chance.

Thanks!

yep. My Kid turned 5 on Aug. 30. He was JUST UNDER the cut-off (Sept. 1).

I was a November baby, so I was the youngest in my class. I was fine with that. Like My Kid, I was more than ready (academically as well as socially) to go ahead and start.

One parent asked me, "Consider this: do you want him to go off to college when he's 17 almost 18 or 18 almost 19?" That's a good arguement, but we started him anyway.

He's done fine. I seriously do not think you or he will suffer from either decision. Have you talked to him? What does he want to do?

Well, only you know Bear and know what's best, but here's my two cents. I was among the youngest in my class, started Kindergarten at 4 and was 17 when I graduated (turned 18 in October of my freshman year at college). I never struggled academically, really (just from laziness, not because it was too hard). I did feel less mature sometimes than my contemporaries, but I STILL feel that way every now and then ;). I just think school is such a long haul, giving the child the extra year of freedom at the end is worth it, especially if the teacher thinks he's ready. Good luck with your decision!

Wow, this is a tough one, and you won't know what the right answer was for several years. For future public school, they generally won't/shouldn't make him repeat grades he's successfully managed at the Mont. school.

My kids also have fall birthdays, and I started them both early because of the academic boredom factor. (Teachers and schools SHOULD put most weight on the academics, but you know, eventually they don't.) And yes, I worry more about the boy's social development (now in second grade) that I do about the girl's (now in fifth).

I have come to understand that even for kids with the same birthday, there's a great variance of "normal" social development--being six months younger does NOT mean you will be smaller, or quieter! Kids don't age/move through stages in lockstep.

I agree with the first poster--put him in K, and you can always repeat K depending on how the next year turns out. (On the other hand, if you're going to quit your job and stay home with him for a year of fun mom-and-kid time, then you want him to keep coming home early, right?)

P.S. We've managed the sports thing by participating in extra-school soccer, where team assignment is strictly based on birthdate, not grade.

Do you see public school in the future at some point? What's the date cutoff there? I also have a November birthday, and graduated HS at 17, but at the time the NYC cutoff wasn't until December, so it wasn't unusual.

Are any of his good friends from preschool going to be in kindegarten next year? If so, and if you like his current teacher, I think I'd go ahead and sign up for the kindegarten slot. You can always send him to kindegarten again the next year if he seems to be overwhelmed.

I think you're in a really good situation, either way. It's great that he doesn't have to change schools, and possibly even teachers. That kind of continuity will be very helpful, whatever option you choose.

It's so hard to predict a kid's social development. Some are early-bloomers, and others are late. Some are naturally charismatic, and others will always be awkward. I personally don't think it's bad for a kid to be a little out of step with his peers, since kids these days do some really stupid things.

I always thought sending a child to school early was a good idea, but now I wonder if, from an athletic perspective, it's better to wait. If you think Bear will want to be active in sports, I suppose it might put him at a disadvantage to be so much younger than the other kids.

I wouldn't worry about the social thing as much. Age isn't the determinant of social ability and acceptance. If he is ready academically, let him go. I was a november baby, if they had held me back I would have been bored to tears. Some bored and frustrated kids can be trouble.

My grandmother's best friend was a teacher and when my parents were faced with this question for me (mid-August birthday), she said that since I was already reading it would've been cruel to keep me in kindergarden where I would've been bored and drive the teacher nuts. Yet since then, we've agreed that boys end up two years behind the girls in maturity somewhere around middle school and they could benefit from being a little older.

My daughter has got a late September birthday like me. I started K early. So did my hubs (early Sept bday). And we both did fine. We've had our girl tested for readiness at two different schools. All the teachers at her preschool and all the Moms who've stayed in the class to help out during this school year all agree. That's she's ready. So with all that input we decided to get her started in kindergarten this fall. She'll be attending a small charter school. We chose this route so that she'll get more individualized attention and be in a more intimate setting.

I wouldn't do it. My two boys have August or September birthdays. My oldest turned 6 just after kindergarten started and my youngest will be 6 likely just days before kindy. They're better off, I think. And yes, especially boys.

My daughter on the other hand has a May birthday, is one of the younger kids in her class and she's just fine. My boys - well, my oldest in particular - would have been socially far, far behind. These are all children who've been in preschool and they go to public elementary. So your educational miles may vary!

Thanks so much.

I wonder if it is different for boys and girls.

But then again, I'm a November birthday and was pushed ahead so that I graduated at 17 years old and I was always socially just a step behind too.

Thanks Carmen, for the long-term view, you've given me a perspective I didn't have!

My oldest child was young to start K. I won't make that mistake again.

It didn't make that big of a difference in k, or first or second grades. But now, in 7th, I can see that it would have been better to wait. Academically, no. He's doing really well - all A's and B's. Socially, he's on the outskirts. He's also one of the few that haven't begun to go through puberty yet - some of the girls are taller than he is.

My third child, and my fourth, as well as my fifth, all have summer birthdays. All either have started a year later, or will start a year later, when they do go to school. I have no doubt about that at all. My third child is leaping over the stuff that they other kids in her class are doing; I think it's because she's a bit older. She also has more confidence. Child #6, she's a December birthday, so no problems there.

Anyway, that's my (long) two cents.

Good luck!