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The Bathroom Incident
October 07, 2004 | Category: Mother to the First Power
Tales from the Mommy-front ~
Bear (bending down and wiggling to look): Wow, Mommy! That's the most biggest poopy I EVER SAW!
Me (averting my eyes): Mmhmmm, hold steady now while I finish wiping.
Bear (excitedly): And it's GREEN! Mommy, my poopy is green goblin!
Me (glancing quickly as I throw in the TP): Well, honey, it's really mostly just brown...
Bear: No! It's green and it's FLOATY! My POOPY IS FLOATING! MOMMY! GET THE CAMERA!
Me: No... honey, now...
Bear: I think we need to take a picture! RIGHT NOW! OF MY POOPY!!
Me (reaching over and flushing): No, honey. No, now we're just going to wash...
Bear: MOMMY! You flushed my poopy! It was MY POOPY! I wanted to flush my poopy! I wanted to take a picture!
Me: OK, I'm -
Bear (throwing himself unconsolably on the bathroom floor and wailing): You FLUSHED MY POOPY! That was naughty!
Me: Next time you can flush -
Bear (sniffing): I miss my poopy. It was my favorite poopy ever.
Me: Well, poopies are waste, Bear. They are meant to go back into the ground and -
Bear: And it wasn't yours. It was mine. I flush my poopies, Mommy.
Me: Well, from now on -
Bear (sighing, last BIG sniffle, standing): It's OK, Mommy. Everyone makes mistakes. Now I have to wash my hands. You stand over there, OK? You just watch.
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